The second most popular question I get from couples after Wedding Invitation Wording is how to address the envelopes. While some couples still opt for an inner and outer envelope, many choose to just go with one envelope and struggle with how to word guest names. I often have couples tell me that they want guest names to be in a similar style to their day. In other words, if your day isn't incredibly formal, you might not want your invitations addressed to Mr. and Mrs. John Smith. Maybe instead you would like your invitation addressed to Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith or simply, John and Jane Smith.
Note: This post is mainly for couples going with the one envelope option.
Again, I always default to Emily Post as my starting point for suggested wording options and go from there. As I've said before, this is your day and what is most important is that you are comfortable with the way guests are invited to your wedding. So for me, Emily Post is the perfect starting place and we alter the wording to best match your style.
You can always change guest name styles as you see fit. So maybe for your friends you would like to be more informal and go with John and Jane Smith. But for your parents friends or great aunt Sally who might be offended by or comment on the informal wording, maybe you address their invitation as Mr. and Mrs. John Smith (or some variation of that). Another thing to consider is order of names, there is nothing wrong with listing the name of the person you are closest with first. So for example, if your best friend is married, maybe you address her invitation as Mrs. and Mr. Jane and John Smith.
Things that absolutely must be included on your envelope are - guest names, street address, city, state and zip. Every word should be spelled out (e.g., "street"). State's can be abbreviated but for me personally, I always think it looks nice to spell the state out. Plus, if you are using a script font state abbreviations can look odd.
It is important to talk to your stationery designer about how to get them your addresses. I have a standard excel template for my couples who are printing their guest addresses which has eight columns: two guest name columns (e.g., parents column 1, kids column 2), two address columns (e.g., street column 1, apartment number column 2), city column, state column, zip code column and country column (optional). Typically, this is pretty similar to what my clients already have started but getting addresses into this template is necessary for sending them to print.
So let's talk through a few examples for guest names:
Couple, not married
Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Johnson
John Smith and Jane Johnson
Ms. Jane Johnson and Mr. John Smith
Jane Johnson and John Smith
Married
Mr. and Mrs. John Smith
Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith
Mrs. and Mr. Jane and John Smith
John and Jane Smith
Jane and John Smith
Married, wife didn't change her last name
Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Johnson
Ms. Jane Johnson and Mr. John Smith
John Smith and Jane Johnson
Jane Johnson and John Smith
Single, no guest
Mr. John Smith
John Smith
Single, plus guest (when you don't know their name)
Mr. John Smith and guest
John Smith and guest
Couple, plus children
Mr. and Mrs. John Smith (line 1)
Mr. Andrew Smith, Miss Anne Smith (children- line 2 - typically used for children under 18)
Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Family
The Smith Family
Divorced
Ms. Jane Smith
Ms. Jane Johnson (maiden name if she now goes by it)
Widowed
Mrs. John Smith (most traditional and often the safest bet)
Mrs. Jane Smith
Ms. Jane Smith
Doctor
Dr. John Smith and Mrs. Jane Smith (married, husband is doctor)
Dr. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith (married, wife is doctor)
Drs. John and Jane Smith or Drs. Jane and John Smith (both doctors)
Dr. John Smith and Dr. Jane Johnson (both doctors, she did not change her name or not married)
So much to think about, I know, and I am sure I did not even cover all of the possible options. But know your stationery designer is always there to bounce ideas off of and make the process as smooth as possible.